


come out and play

by Heavydirtys0ul



Series: the billie eilish tapes [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-18
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-30 22:18:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17837156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heavydirtys0ul/pseuds/Heavydirtys0ul
Summary: Despite everything Logan had disliked about Roman, he always takes the chance to make things greater (Even himself).





	come out and play

__**“Wake up and smell the coffee  
Is your cup half full or empty?  
When we talk, you say it softly  
But I love it when you’re awfully quiet  
  
You see a piece of paper  
Could be a little greater  
Show me what you could make her  
You’ll never know until you try it  
And you don’t have to keep it quiet,”**   


There was a point in Logan’s life where Roman Prince had driven him insane; he could barely spend a minute at a time with him before he was losing his patience. He’d grown since then, and so had Roman and the two were starting to settle from their fights and arguments to casual debates over a cup of coffee. 

Somewhere between that starting and now he’d noticed things about Roman that he’d never really noticed before. Not just aesthetically speaking, he’d previously known that his friend had been attractive, although he’d never really noticed the exact shade of brown they were or the way the loose strands of his hair that escape the pins fall into them. Okay, so he might not have noticed how attractive he is. 

And Logan was nothing if not a disaster when it came to romance. 

But also, he’d noticed the way Roman can’t leave things alone; he always wants to make everything…a little greater. There are pieces of art and drawings that he’s been touching up for years, and then there are napkins in cafes that have his doodles all over them because he simply can’t stand the negative space. There are the tattoos that have been doubling each year all up his arms and the makeup he wears, he loves to create more than anything, even people are a blank canvas to him (The time that he’d made Logan’s arm into a solar system with paintbrushes springs to mind). 

But surely it can’t be easy to love a man that is never satisfied?

And yet Logan correctly identified the way his heart elevates and his cheeks go a little red and throat dry up as just that. The logical man hates the mess that comes with him, but dear  _God_  does he love Roman more. 

But Roman surely deserves better, he deserves someone who sees things as he does and loves as much as he does, not a man that took three years to realize exactly what was right in front of him (If Roman knew, he’d tell him he needed better glasses, and Logan would roll his eyes, but he doesn’t know, well not that Logan knows anyway).

Roman does, in fact, know, unlike Logan he’s no stranger to romance and even if for the past year most of his romantic escapades have been a distraction from the other, he knows Logan and he knows when he’s started acting differently. For example, he’s the most eloquent and attentive man that Roman knows but yesterday he spent five minutes trying to answer a question as simple as “What do you want for dinner?” He ended those five minutes by asking what Roman had asked. He’d cottoned on about a year and a half ago. The truth is, Roman doesn’t need Logan to tell him he loves him because he can see it in the undertones of how he acts and talks and lets him paint all up and down his arms despite hating even a little ink from his pen on his skin. 

He’d also got progressively quieter, at first Roman had genuinely been worried until he’d realized the reason Logan is quieter is because he spends most of the conversation staring at Roman with a soft and love-struck expression, instead of actually listening. 

So Roman knew, but he wasn’t sure how to actually approach the topic. 

__**“And I know it makes you nervous  
But I promise you, it’s worth it  
To show ‘em everything you kept inside  
Don’t hide, don’t hide  
Too shy to say, but I hope you stay  
Don’t hide away  
Come out and play,”**   


Logan is not a confident romantic, he spent most of his teenage years trying to convince his friends he didn’t experience emotion at all. He does, maybe not the same way as others, but falling in love had been quite an intense and frankly terrifying experience. And Roman, being his second oldest friend knew this. He didn’t want to scare Logan with the possibility of a relationship but he also didn’t want him holding on forever with a secret that wasn’t really a secret. 

How should he approach this topic? 

Logan would tell him to just ask (if he knew that Roman knew). In truth, he himself was getting tired of keeping it to himself out of his own fear. Now, he sits cross-legged on the couch of their shared apartment with a book open in his lap whilst he stares out of the window. It’s snowing, a rare occurrence for them both so if he knows Roman the moment he wakes up he’s going to want to go running into the white little flakes. 

__**“ Look up, out of your window  
See snow, won’t let it in though  
Leave home, feel the wind blow  
'Cause it’s colder here inside in silence  
You don’t have to keep it quiet,”**   


“Logan,” The corners of his lips curl upwards, confirming his own prediction as he folds the corner of the book page and places it on the coffee table “Come on! It’s snowing!” A coat is being thrown at him and his hand is grabbed, tugging him towards the door. Old Logan would have protested and told Roman not to be silly, that it was illogical to be excited by snow. Logan now would sit in the cold all night if it meant he got to see the smile on the other man’s face. 

Plus happiness is logical. 

The wind blows gently and the flakes of snow become caught in Roman’s hair, he lets out a laugh as his hands reach up to try and catch the melting flakes. The smile turns devious as he starts grabbing it from the ground instead. The squeal that left Logan’s mouth was certainly a manly one (Or so he would say, the little girl building a snowman in the next garden over would say differently), as a snowball is launched at his head. 

This, of course, ignites a full snowball fight, until the two of them are shivering and red in the face from laughing. Logan’s happy he met Roman, or else he might’ve never enjoyed a snowball fight when the snow finally came. 

The two collapse on the couch, the brown-eyed man pulling his legs to his chest and his head resting on Logan’s shoulder as he searched for warmth. They pull a blanket from the floor onto them and settle into a cup of hot chocolate in the quiet. Roman’s heart beats steadily in his chest as the realization that he never quite wants to move, comfortable as Logan’s arm finds it’s way around his shoulders and the small smile on their faces becomes more apparent. How often had they had moments like this, where they’d felt so content to exist side by side, and not realized it?

“Logan?” Roman mutters, moving a little so that he can see the other’s face. He can see the freckles on his cheeks and the blue of his eyes peering through those ridiculously dorky glasses. Logan looks back with every emotion he’s ever felt suddenly maximized by tenfold. Perhaps the reason that he and Roman never used to get along is because he makes him  _feel_  so much.   


He’d so much wanted to be taken seriously that he’d completely got rid of an entire side of him and then  _blamed_  Roman for it. Roman had long since forgiven those days, years ago now and not one to dwell on the past; but Logan had, quite rightly, not forgotten just how cruel he had been to the creative man. It was important to him that his mistakes never be forgotten, lest they are repeated. 

“Yes?” His voice comes out gentle, his cheeks a little flushed from the cold and warmth occurring simultaneously, and then just how close the other is too him. Roman smiles and Logan knows, then, somehow, that Roman knows. Then he wonders how long the other had looked at him like that-so happy, content and warm; how long had he missed the look that he’d seen in the mirror every time he thought of Roman?

“I know…I know you’re nervous, and I know how you feel, and I didn’t know how to approach it without panicking you,” The cerulean eyed man blinks carefully, his breath catches in his throat, panicking just as Roman had predicted. “But you don’t need to be scared, or panicked, or worried,” He manages to stop his head from making so much noise for a moment as he concentrates on what Roman’s saying “You don’t have to hide your feelings, those days are long gone now,”   


Logan thinks he’s crying, his visions a little blurry but he doesn’t really know what to say either, so he nods and smiles and takes Roman’s still slightly cold hand into his own. 

__**“Yeah, I know it makes you nervous  
But I promise you, it’s worth it  
To show 'em everything you kept inside  
Don’t hide, don’t hide  
Too shy to say but I hope you stay  
Don’t hide away  
Come out and play,”**   


Roman’s hand comes to Logan’s cheek and brushes a thumb over the tears that are falling “Can I kiss you?” The breathless sound that escapes Logan’s throat could’ve been a yes, as he nods his head just to make sure the other understands. Logan had kissed people before and he’d held hands with people before, but he’d never kissed a man he’d loved romantically before; it felt different, not better or worse, just different. 

It felt like he’d been thirsty for a very long time and someone had handed him a pitcher of water. That’s how he’d best describe it, as Roman’s hands run through his dark hair and his own hand rests on the other man’s shoulder (He’d work out his hand placements at some point, his brain is mostly short-circuiting right now). His brain goes from “Holy shit, I’m kissing Roman,” to “Wow his lips are so soft,” amongst several other thoughts but he can’t really follow any of them. 

By the time they’ve pulled away (And Logan remembers how to think and breathe), he’s stopped crying and their foreheads rest together for a second. “I promise you it will be worth it Logan,” His voice and eyes are so full of sincerity that Logan is worried he’s going to cry again, but instead he just shakes his head instead. 

“You were always worth it,”


End file.
